Just Focus Your Attention on the "I"

When it comes to the spiritual practice of Self Inquiry, it is actually very simple.  However, because it is approached improperly, it seems complicated or even impossible. Let us look at this issue in some detail.

When a seeker first comes to the topic of Non-duality or Advaita, he or she (going forwards for sake of ease of writing, only the pronoun "he" shall be used although it encompasses all) approaches it like any other objective knowledge.  He takes for granted that he is an entity -  the idea that "I am a body made up of flesh and bones" - who is going to study and attain knowledge about the non-dual Reality just like he would any other objective knowledge. While initially this approach is perfectly alright, eventually difficulty will be encountered. By this approach, only an inferential knowledge can be gained. Meaning thereby, one can understand some of the basic principles about the Unreal and the Real. However,  Knowledge about the Ultimate Reality will not be obtained by this method. 

As long as one does inquiry of the Self maintaining a separate and independent idea or conviction of being a body-mind entity, there is no hope of realizing the Self. The Self is not some thing that is to be attained. Such an approach will only lead one down a rabbit hole of innumerable concepts about the nature of the Self, all of which would be false since they are just concepts.  The non-conceptual Self cannot be known in the form of concepts!

In Self Inquiry, the most important investigation is actually to find out if and where the "I" exists.  Yes, this "I' is the same "I am the body with a mind" entity we are talking about - i.e. you, the reader.  Let us see, right here and now, if there is actually an entity that is reading this passage. In this case, the passage is the object of the vision and there is apparently an entity calling himself the "reader' of this passage (the subject). To keep things simple, the passage appears as an image on the retina of the eye thereby triggering electrical impulses. The electrical impulses travel via the Optic Nerve and reach the portion of the brain called the Visual Cortex. So far, so good.  But, is there really some entity or someone who is analyzing the electrical information? Look carefully to see if there is really an entity, an occupant in the solid mass of tissue called the brain, who is looking out through the windows called the eyes and then declaring " I am seeing". Or, as is obvious on careful analysis, what is obviously a mass of water and other elements (constituting the brain) is incapable of actually "seeing" or even "analyzing" the information received at the visual cortex.  So, who is this "I" that is apparently reading or analyzing the information and where is the location for this "I"? The same investigation can be done for other actions or sensations that are perceived by the body.  Further, the same investigation can be done asking - who is the "feeler" or the "thinker"?

So, it becomes clear from the inquiry, that there is a mysterious entity called "I"- an owner occupant-  that takes ownership of the body and all its actions and also ownership of the thoughts and feelings.  One must investigate, who exactly is this "I" who has appeared in the waking and the dream states to take ownership of the body and mind? However, this "I", along with the world of objects seems to somehow disappear or subside in deep dreamless sleep. Yet, when one wakes up from sleep, one usually has memory of having slept as is obvious, when upon waking, one states - " I slept happily".  It is obvious that there is some other non-entity that is aware of the three states of wakefulness, dream and deep sleep and yet is unaffected by all these states. That which is beyond these three states is referred to as the "Turiya" (literally meaning the fourth). However, it is not a state since the other three states appear in it. To avoid going down the rabbit hole, let us get back to you - the "I" - the doer, the reader, the thinker, the feeler, the perceiver, the sufferer, the enjoyer etc.

There are many other investigative methods mentioned in the Advaitic literature and shastras. Regardless of which method you use, the focus of attention should always be on this " I am the body" idea. Where did the idea or thought "I am the body" arise from? What is the source? Is the "I" an entity or is it just a thought?  What are thoughts? Is there any such thing called the "mind"? Or is the mind just thoughts and nothing else? Hang on to the "I -thought" once you have established that it is just a thought. Is it not true that all other thoughts are anchored to this "I- thought"? Can other thoughts exist in the absence of the "I-thought"? Do you exist in the absence of thoughts? 

Knowing the Self is being the Self. When the idea of individuality disappears, the Self which is always self shining and always here and now becomes self evident. No one has to go searching for the Sun using a lamp! Eventually, you will realize that the entire exercise of self inquiry is being played out in the mind, which in itself has no existence apart from the Self. It is ONLY when the mind finally becomes STILL, that the Pure Awareness shines through. The way to stillness is to inquire who is this "I" and the "I" disappears like a ghost or phantom - as it no longer has any object or form to hold on to. Stillness is beingness. 

Understanding Non-Duality From Standpoint of Duality

One of the most perplexing things is to try to understand non-duality or advaita, from the viewpoint of duality.  Let us explore this a bit more in detail.

All communication via language, writing etc. happens in the sphere of duality. There is a subject -i.e. me, who understands the object explained in a language that I understand. This is true for all aspects of knowledge including the arts, literature, sciences and common every day communication. It is based on developing certain concepts of language communication. When someone says the word "water" in the English language, the person hearing it or reading it understands that the word refers to a colorless, clear liquid. The mind translates the word into a conceptual understanding of the meaning of the word heard or read.

The very nature of communication implies the existence of a subject, "I" - which implies identification with a body and a name- trying to explain an object using concepts and ideas. The problem arises when the teacher of non-duality tries to explain an abstract idea of non-duality to another body-name identity using the same principles of communication as explained above. Non-duality encompasses all of duality and non-duality. So, how does one go about trying to wrap the so called head around it?

The main problem is the seeker who tries to understand Non-duality while still maintaining his or her identity as an individual. The seeker tries to maintain his identity as a separate individual and tries to attain or obtain non-duality. Do you realize the paradox of the situation? There can be no duality in non-duality. No question of a subject and an object. No question of a "me" attaining. No question of a "me" understanding the ONE essence that is everything.  Just this ONE without a second.

As long as the seeker refuses to let go of his continued misidentification with the body-mind entity, he or she will never get around to understanding the simplicity being explained in advaita or non-duality. The seeker wants to take credit for having finally "Understood". Presumably also wanting credit for the many hours and years of meditation and spiritual process involved to reach the understanding. Do you see the paradox here?

It helps to get back to the very basics of advaita teaching. First comes the sense of presence, or consciousness or sense of beingness. Prior to everything else. Every thing, including the concept of individuality and the subsequent dualism, and all other concepts come only because of the sense of presence. No presence - no things, no concepts, no you. Think about it for a moment.  Are you currently present or not? There is no way you can deny your presence at this very moment. All thoughts including the thought "I am" can only arise if you are present. Now, if somehow your thoughts would cease (if only for a moment), would you stop being present or stop existing? Try it. You will know the answer. Did you disappear?

However, if you were asked to explain your experience in that moment of thoughtlessness, you would come up with a blank. That is because you are trying to explain that sense of presence or consciousness or beingness, with concepts and words. Concepts and words are an expression in duality. When presented with this nonconceptual awareness or sense of presence, the mind draws a blank. Hence, the seeker who identifying with the mind, tries to comprehend this sense of presence, fails miserably.

As a result, the seeker falsely believes that there is a process or doing involved in trying to get to this 'sense of presence'. The frustrated seeker says " I know I am present but surely there must be something wrong I am doing as I cannot conceptualize this presence or beingness". The mind can go around and around in circles or get lost in a maze of concepts trying to grasp non-duality. The seeker remains in a state of seeking as a result of trying to conceptualize the nonconceptual.

So, what is the way out? - asks the seeker. It is quite simple. Don't try to conceptualize the nonconceptual. Realize that only consciousness understands consciousness and in doing so transcends consciousness. There is no individual here to take credit.

Realize that there is no alternative presence apart from this presence - which is evident right here and right now. Don't fall prey to the endless games and tricks that the mind plays. There is no future time that you will be present than this very moment. Watch the mind and realize that you are not the mind but the silent, unchanging witness of the mind.

JUST STOP. In doing so, you ARE. Got it?

Neti- Neti or Not This Not This

Water is water, whether it is in a stream, a lake, a river or in an ocean. Space is space whether it is the space in a vessel or the space in a house or the space out in the open. In the same way, consciousness is consciousness and there is nothing apart from consciousness. There is no such entity as individual consciousness and universal consciousness. Yet, this distinction is made in the process of teaching a student so that he or she can comprehend what is being pointed to.  You may question as to why if every one is the same consciousness, should there be the perception that you are a separate being. The answer would be because of ignorance. Because of ignorance, consciousness believes itself to be limited to a particular body and mind, giving rise to the idea of being a separate entity or person. Ignorance is indeed the cause of this false identification. It is this essential false belief that is the basic cause of all suffering. This belief in separation from who you really are. So, how do we get out of this bind?  Luckily, we do not have to reinvent the wheel. The ancient Rishis (sages) have already found many ways in which one can unravel this puzzle.

One of the ways to do so is to use the method of discrimination. By using a discriminating intellect can one  begin to identify the self from the not-self. In ancient Advaitic literature, this method was called "neti- neti" or " not this-not this".  By careful analysis of what is self (atman) and what is not (anatman), one can gradually eliminate all that is not the self. If this method of analysis is done properly and by avoiding any conceptual digression, one can eventually apperceive the Truth.

In fact, you can only know what you are not. Anything that is known can never be the knower since it would immediately become an object and hence does not qualify as a knower anymore. In fact, eventually it becomes clear that there is just "knowing" without a knower and a known. When all that is known has thus been eliminated as not the self, there is just the pure sense of being, the Knowledge of Existence which still persists. One can never eliminate the fact that one exists. This knowledge that "I am" is self evident. It is obvious that you are none other than this Beingness. Don't try to qualify beingness or you will be back in the trap of falseness. Beingness has no quality. Just be.

Enlightenment in Five Verses- Part One

This post deals with one of the most profound yet simple Advaita teaching. It comes from Shri Adi Shankaracharya, the great Advaita Saint. The teaching is contained in just a few verses, which if read carefully, keeping the mind and heart open, may result in instant enlightenment.  These are some of the most profound verses in all of Advaita Vedanta literature.  The text is called Maneeshaapanchakam. The essence of Advaita Vedanta is brought out succinctly in these brief verses.

Before we proceed, let us see the reason for these verses. One day, Sri Shankaracharya ( aka Shankara) was on his way to the temple of Lord Viswanatha along with his disciples, after finishing his ritual bath. It so happened that a Chandaala (a low caste person or untouchable caste working as a street sweeper) was walking along the same street and was obstructing the path along which Sri Sankara was walking. Sri Sankara asked the Chandaala to move away from his path (In ancient times, it was considered inauspicious for a higher caste person to encounter a Chandaala especially on the way to or after performing religious rituals). The Chandaala then asked Sri Sankara some questions which are the basis of the first two verses in this text. These questions are the prelude to the Five verses quoted by Sri Sankara. The Five verses are collectively called "Maneeshaapanchakam".  Maneeshaa means "conviction" and  "panchakam" means a collection of five verses or shlokas. All the five verses end with the word "maneesha mamah" meaning "This is my conviction".

While, one could spend a lot of time arguing over how an Enlightened soul like Sri Shankara could practice untouchability, it would unnecessarily deviate one's attention from the deep message contained in these verses.  The story may also point to the strong association of beingness with the body and mind, showing how even an Enlightened one like Sri Shankara could temporarily fall off the razors edge.

Chandala to Shankara:

1. अन्नामयादान्नमयम्थ्वा चैतन्यमेव चैतान्यात । 
द्विजवर दूरीकर्तु वाञछ्सी किं ब्रूहि गच्छ गच्छेति ॥

1.  O'great among the twice-born! What is it that you want to move away by saying "Go, go"? Do you want the body made up of food to move away from another body made up of food? Or, do you want the consciousness to move away from consciousness?

2.  किं गंगाम्बुनी बिम्बितेओम्ब्र्मनौ चंदाल्वातिपयः
पूरे चंत्रमस्ती कच्च्न्घतिम्रित्कुम्भ्योवोर्म्ब्रे।
प्रत्याग्वस्तुनी निस्तारान्ग्सह्जान्न्दाव्बोधाम्बुधौ
विप्रोअयम्श्व्प्चोअय्मित्य्पिमहन्कोअयम्विभेद्भ्रमः ॥

2. Is there any difference in the reflection of the Sun in the waters of the Ganges river and its reflection in the water in a ditch in the quarters of an outcaste? Is there any difference in the space as such, be it the space contained in a gold pot or a clay pot?  What is this illusion of difference in the form of "this is a Brahmin(higher caste) and this is an Outcaste", in the inner Self which is none other than the thought-less Ocean of Bliss and self existing consciousness?

Note: The inner Self or consciousness is the same in all creatures.

If Only I could Kill My Ego

As you may be aware by reading through the Advaita literature, that a lot of advice is given on how it is important to kill the ego as the means of Self Realization. Let us look at this topic in our discussion today. The ego is nothing but the "I-thought" or the idea of being an individual. In fact, the ego and the mind are one and the same. Why? The first thought which is the basis of all other thoughts is the thought- "I". When the first person, I, arises, all other thoughts arise and are all linked to this primary thought - "I". Therefore, it is essential to decipher the source of this very first thought, or the "I- thought" as the way to realizing one's True Nature or Self Realization as it is called. The ego is the first person, the I, or the individual that one believes oneself to be. The ego makes one believe that he or she is a separate entity with substance and its own independent existence.

The very idea that you being the ego, will somehow go about and kill the ego is itself ludicrous.  There is no doubt that the ego trying to kill itself would be a futile exercise since it would be similar to suicide, though not physically. Well, that is not the goal of Self Realization, certainly!  If all who have Realized their Self would be dead, then there should have been no one to pass on this Knowledge to others? As Ramana Maharshi has said, the ego trying to kill the ego is similar to a thief pretending to be the policeman and wanting to catch the thief. There can be nothing more ridiculous. But, despite this very obvious statement, many a seeker still wants to be deluded into believing that somehow the ego can be controlled or killed.  Because of this misunderstanding, the seeker will try to somehow seek out a method (or sadhana) to do so. After going around in circles, as would be not surprising considering the very nature of the goal in mind, the seeker becomes frustrated and helpless. Many others will say that Advaita teaching is impractical and still others may say that it is a fatalistic philosophy.  Unfortunately, many a seeker has been led astray because of misunderstanding of the teachings.

This statement about the ego needs clarification for many. The ego cannot and should not be sought out for destruction in some way. Instead, it is essential for one to find out if the ego has any existence apart from the consciousness.  Does the ego have any substance or independent nature apart from consciousness? Is it not true that you have to be conscious to know you exist as an individual? In this realm of consciousness, the idea of being a first person- "I", arises. This "I" is nothing but the thought- I, or the ego. A thought has no substance. Look for it and SEE for yourself.  A thought has no substance and has no independent existence apart from consciousness.  When there are no thoughts including the "I-thought", you still exist. Try it and see. Stop all thoughts even for a moment. You do not fall apart.

When sincerely inquired into, the ego is like a ghost. It vanishes like the ghost which never existed in the first place. And yet, there is no denying that there is awareness or the sense of being without being this or that. This stillness, which is pure beingness, is experienced by all when the "I-thought" subsides, however transient it may be. So, the question finally arises, why and how would you want to kill something that doesn't exist?  Why kill the ego when it is unreal and has no existence apart from consciousness? Why not instead investigate and find out the nature of the ego and realize that it is like a ghost? How can you kill a ghost?  So, give up the idea of killing the ego or the mind, and instead focus on inquiring into the nature of the ego or the mind.

The End Of Spirituality

It is indeed amazing that we take for granted that we are an entity- an entity with a name and form. One rarely if ever questions the source or the origin of this entity. In the meantime, one is busy gathering more and more knowledge from various sources to enhance their self worth, whether it be in the field of arts and sciences, material wealth, religious knowledge or spiritual knowledge. Based on this gathered knowledge, one begins to feel important or great about themselves. Often the one who has gained knowledge of scriptures and spiritual knowledge feels superior to others who are ignorant of this knowledge. The spiritualist feels that he or she can somehow save the world and solve its problems.

Sadly, such a spiritualist has obviously not found out the truth about his/her own True Identity. Such a one has failed to question the source of the knowledge "I am". One has failed to question and find out the source of beingness, the taste of beingness, and the nature of beingness. Why and how has this beingness appeared? What makes the beingness what it is? In the absence of this body, would there be any knowledge of beingness and to whom?  No one seems to be interested in getting to the bottom of these questions. One is more interested in the branches of the tree rather than the roots. Understandably, the branches are more easily seen but it is the roots that you are really after.

All knowledge is in the realm of consciousness. But have you ever wondered what exactly is this consciousness and is it really the Truth? Is this consciousness not the source of this grand illusion, that we call the world and the universe. Without consciousness, would there be a 'you' or a 'me'? Is it not true that because of this consciousness, you have come to know that you are? What happens to all this knowledge of spirituality you have collected, if there is no 'you'? Who is it that claims ownership of spirituality?

When the Truth dawns on 'you', 'you' disappear and merge into the Truth. With your disappearance, there is the end of spirituality. THAT is beyond knowledge and ignorance. THAT is who you really, really ARE. Don't get fooled by the illusion of beingness. Step backwards and beyond this illusion to submerge into the Truth. The problem with most seekers is that they are unwilling to take this step.

THAT is Beyond I Am

Presently, you KNOW you are. This knowledge of I AM, has given you this sense of being.  You have taken this knowledge to be real and because of it, you are suffering. One has to question as to how this knowledge of beingness came about. What were you prior to this knowledge of beingness?  Unless these questions are inquired into, the final answer will not come about. Did you do anything to attain this knowledge, I Am?  You may wonder, "if this knowledge, I Am, is not the Reality, then what use is it?". Don't dismiss this knowledge I AM.  In fact, the ultimate purpose of this knowledge I Am, is for you to unravel the mystery of how this all came about. In fact, I Am is your God and this God is going to pave the path to Self Discovery and Self Realization. So, hang on to the I Am for it is everything.

What you really, really ARE is beyond the knowledge I Am. Since, there is no description for that State, it is simply called THAT or the Absolute. In THAT, there is no I Am. It is beyond I Am. It is beyond all dyads and triads. Because, it is a State prior to consciousness and thereby the mind, it is impossible for the limited mind to fathom what by nature is beyond both limited and unlimited. When one says "I am That", one acknowledges the fact that I Am is a derivative of THAT.  There is no way for one to know THAT in the objective sense, since IT is beyond both the subject and the object.  You are none other than THAT. Just reach this Understanding.

Mind In, Mind Out

The mind, which is nothing but a bundle of thoughts, is the window to perceive the world outside. But, the mind is not what perceives the world. It is only a window.  The one who perceives the world is behind the window, so to speak. The consciousness "I am" is the cause for the perception of the world. No consciousness, no world.  Simple.

When the mind is focused or turned outwards, it perceives the world of objects. In fact, objectification is through the mind only. The sense organs are the conduit for the mind to objectify the world outside. The mind creates the false identity of being a person, a "me".  A false entity that believes itself to be the 'seer', the subject. Because of the belief in this false entity, one goes about thinking that it is "me" who is actually perceiving, seeing, hearing, thinking, talking, etc. Now, you may notice the word 'thinking' is in italics. That is because the false subject "me" is nothing but a thought. No thoughts, no "me". Yet, despite the absence of a "me", the perceiving goes on none the less. Only, there is no one (no "me") claiming to do the perceiving. This is obvious proof that the "me" is NOT the one who is doing the perceiving.  The world appears to be, only as long as the mind is turned outward i.e. towards the sense objects.

To know who you really, really are, it is essential to turn the mind inwards. In this case, the mind is turned away from the sense objects to the source of the mind itself. The easiest way to do so is Self-Inquiry. On asking the question "Who am I?", the mind subsides into its source. The source is consciousness. When the mind is turned inwards, there is no mind left. Only consciousness prevails. The mind has submerged itself into its source, i.e. consciousness.  There is just this Being, being Itself. Just being is bliss.

The path to bliss is simple. Just turn the mind inward to its Source.  

Dead and Gone-Part 2

Often the entity or person that is supposedly dead is also the one that you loved very much. For instance, and just for instance as an example, it could be one of your parents.  Sorry for this rather stark analogy but it serves the purpose of Awakening you. You loved your mother a lot when she was alive.  For all your life, you assumed your mother was the body that she represented. You saw that same body change continuously just like yours. The change could be called deterioration of the body.  Perhaps, the change in the body was minimal and the so called 'death' came suddenly. In any case, the object of your love suddenly seemed to have vanished into thin air. Precisely, into thin air.  For, if indeed she was the body, the body was still there after the so called 'death'.  So, you may ask "where did my mother go?".

If you pause to think over this carefully, you may wonder who was it that was your mother? She certainly could not be the body for it is lying there in an inert condition and refusing to respond to any stimuli from the external world.  Despite your crying for her, she refuses to respond. You are in dismay, for the object of your love, the body, is suddenly refusing to respond to your show of emotion and love.  So, who is it that you loved if not the body? Who is it that you called "mom" and where is she now?

In some cultures and traditions, the dead body is cremated leaving behind the ashes. After all the body is merely a product of the five elements (earth, water, fire, air and space) and all that is left now is the ashes i.e carbon, which is a product of the earth. Is it possible that all along you were loving this carbon ash? Certainly not!  Is it not the entity (or non-entity to be more precise) that animated your mother's body that you actually loved? THAT which is responsible for the animation of your "mother's body", would that not be the same for "your body"?  THAT which gives rise to the sense "I am" to your mother, would that not be the same for "your body"?  Now that your mother is "dead", she no longer has the Knowledge of Being i.e. she is no longer able to say "I am" or for that matter "I am not" either.   So, all along what you thought you loved (as a personality i.e. your mother) was none other than that I AM(the Beingness), which is also WHO YOU ARE (I AM). So, in fact you were loving your own Self all along except that you viewed that body as someone else i.e. your mother. You had failed to see the substratum that animated the gross body.  You had failed to see the Beingness- the same Beingness which animates "your body". Call IT by whatever name or label you want, but there should be no doubt that what you loved all along was none other than your own Self.

So, you can see that pondering over concepts like birth and death can open up avenues to know your True Nature. Now that you Know, keep meditating on that Beingness.