Your Attitude and Identity Matters in Spiritual Pursuit

In the pursuit of Enlightenment or spiritual practice, whatever you may want to call it, your attitude and your identity matters. You currently identify yourself with the body and the mind. However, you may intellectually understand that you are also the spirit or the Self. At different times, you identify with different aspects of your self. You may at times identify with the body and yet at other times get carried away by the thoughts and identify with the mind and yet at other times on introspection, briefly identify with the deeper aspect of your being.

As an analogy, let us look to the famous Indian Epic called the Ramayana. In it, the character, Rama, who represents the eternal Self, has a monkey-assistant, named Hanuman, who represents the mind (or intellect). In the story, at one point, Rama asks Hanuman, "How do you regard me?". And, Hanuman replies, "when I regard myself as the body, I am your servant; when I regard myself as the soul, I am part of you; but when I regard myself as the Universal Self, I am one with you."

The message from this anecdote is that your approach to spirituality or search for the Self or God, is entirely dependent on your attitude of who you identify yourself with. Or, who you believe yourself to be.  If you identify yourself with the body and mind, then the Self is someone else. There is duality in this instance. More like the subject and object relationship in which you are the subject and Self or God is the object. In the story above, in the first two instances of how Hanuman relates himself to Rama, there is a distinct separation between himself and the object of his reverence, Rama. In the first two instances, Hanuman relates to Rama as either a servant or a part of Rama, but in the third instance, he SEES himself as no different from Rama (Self).

Depending on your attitude about who you think yourself to be determines how you approach spirituality. If you consider yourself to be a separate individual, separate from God or Self, then the path of Bhakti or devotion is what you actually end up pursuing.  Although, you as a soul are not different from God or Self, you feel you are and hence you suffer.  It is just an imagination that you are separate but yet you believe it to be true. In this instance, you long to be one with God or Self and you sing songs of praise of God or Self. You repeat the name of God or Mantra (or Japa) to avoid getting distracted from the thought of God.  You meditate on God or Self in an effort to close the gap between your imagined identity as a separate self, and God. As an analogy, if a wave thinks itself to be separate from the Ocean, it prays to the Ocean to reveal itself for it longs to be one with the Ocean at some time. This is despite the fact that it has never been separate from the Ocean to begin with. Or like the rays of the Sun are no different from the Sun, and yet if the ray feels or thinks of itself as a distinct entity, it longs to be one with the Sun. In the same way you believe yourself to be a separate entity and in desperation pray, meditate, sing bhajans, do japa, in the hope that one day God will reveal Himself to you.  At long last, the clouds of your self imposed ego clear, and the clear Light of the Self shines through in all its glory, and you exclaim in joy " I am the Self and I have never been anything but the Self".

On the other hand, you may be told by your Guru that you are none other than the Self, and because of your complete faith, trust and conviction in the teachings of the Guru you accept His words as such. Or else, you analyze and question the teachings of the Guru and reach the conclusion through direct experience of being the clear Awareness without attributes. You arrive at the conviction that the Guru is indeed correct in saying that you are the SELF and have never been anything but the SELF. This is the path of Jnana or Knowledge.

In Pursuit of Knowledge

Knowledge can be direct or indirect knowledge. All knowledge that is acquired is indirect knowledge or inferred knowledge. What exactly is indirect knowledge? It is all the knowledge that you acquired throughout what you may call "my life". Be aware of the fact that this indirect knowledge is what was either told to you, read by you, inferred by you or heard by you from various sources including books, web pages, blogs, commentaries, audio files, video files, or from personal encounters with other people. For instance, you were told by your parents that you are their child, that you are a Christian or Hindu or Muslim, that you are white or black or Asian, this is right and this is wrong, and so on and so forth. This knowledge is acquired knowledge and one goes on adding more and more knowledge to continuously create an image of oneself and the world around him or her.  It creates an image of you being this body and this mind, which is separate from the world around you. This image of one's self is constantly changing at all moments depending on moods, thoughts, environments and other factors.  With this creation of a false image of one's self comes the suffering and discontentment that we are all so familiar with. We then seek out an end to this suffering.

In trying to find an end to this suffering, one seeks knowledge. That may be the very reason you are reading this message. While knowledge when sought out correctly can bring about an end to suffering, very often it can lead one on a wild goose chase with no end in sight. That is why it is essential to find and follow the advice of a Guru who can point you in the right direction even in the pursuit of knowledge. In fact, a True Guru will ask you not to pursue any knowledge outside of your self. A True Guru will advise you to avoid looking outside for any knowledge and instead to LOOK INSIDE FOR the source of ALL KNOWLEDGE lies within you. All acquired knowledge is based on concepts and the very pursuit of acquired knowledge adds to your concepts. Strangely, what you are looking for, the solution or an end to your suffering, is not going to be found in conceptual understanding or knowledge. What will indeed end the search would be dropping of all concepts and conceptual understanding. Meaning thereby that one should drop all acquired knowledge and settle for the simple direct knowledge of being to lead to its source. Direct knowledge is knowledge that you did not have to acquire. The knowledge of being, the knowledge of presence, the knowledge that you are is direct knowledge. Direct knowledge does not require any other knowledge to support it. It is like the sunlight, which does not require a lamp to discover it. You don't need anyone else to tell you that you are. You know it!

As the great philosopher, Lao Tzu said "In the pursuit of knowledge, something is added every day. In the pursuit of enlightenment, something is dropped every day." Gradually, in the process of self inquiry, you drop all your false identities and concepts, one by one and in the end are left with no concepts including the concept of being this or being that. In that Stillness of just being, the Truth is revealed.

The Answer is in the Mystery Itself

Why look all over the world for the Truth when the Truth is all around you and within you?

We are given to understand, quite wrongly, that someone or something out there will give us the answer when we are looking for the Truth. Nothing can be farther from the truth in thinking in this manner. No doubt the Guru who may appear as a thought or a form is essential to lead one to the Truth. Yet, when one thinks, where do the thoughts come from? Do they not come from the Eternal Source itself? The Source is Itself the Guru. And still yet, the Source shall remain a mystery when one tries to objectify it. In the sense that the Source cannot be described in words or thoughts. It is Itself beyond or prior to the thoughts and words and hence beyond description.

All intelligence belongs to the Source or who you really are. In fact, all that you see, hear, feel, taste or touch is nothing but the Universal Intelligence at work. Have you ever seen a formation of a flock of birds all flying at once at high speed, flapping their wings almost in unison, and not colliding even once? Have you ever given thought to how that can be possible without an air traffic controller telling each bird how close to the other bird it is and what altitude and direction it is flying? When the flock of flying birds turn, do you see them colliding? Do they not KNOW that in the very next moment all of them will be turning left or all will be turning right? Is it not clear that there is an ALL KNOWING, ALL SEEING, SUPERIOR INTELLIGENCE at play here? Of course, scientists may come in and try to explain that there are sensors and signals that the birds give to each other at all times and hence the synchronicity in action. But then, would the sensors and signals work if there was no LIFE ENERGY in the birds? The Life Energy is itself the Intelligence that is behind all the play that we see in the world around us.

You want another example? How come a newly hatched bird suddenly spreads its wings and takes off flying almost as if it already KNEW all about flying? Ever given it a thought? Does the little bird get some flying instructions? Of course, it can all be explained with the gene theory, is an answer you might hear. Just in case you are wondering what exactly is a gene, it is just DNA (DeoxyriboNucleic Acid), a chemical if you may call it. Can a chemical KNOW? And why doesn't a dead bird fly if it already has the DNA or gene responsible for flying? Answer this question!!

One could go on and on talking about everyday observations which are quite plain and simple mysteries but one may have never given it thought. Or even if one did give it a thought, it was not about what made this mysterious occurrence possible. Look and think about it and contemplate about the possible Source of the mystery itself and it will eventually become clear that there is none other the ONE INTELLIGENT ENERGY that is ALL. One can SEE the answer clearly only when one REALLY WANTS TO LOOK FOR IT.  Just LOOK and SEE. It is obvious that the Truth is all around you and within you.

Abiding as That

Self Realization is actually simple and easy especially when compared to the difficulty in abiding as the Self (That). All Realized Gurus will emphasize the importance of abiding in the Knowledge of Being That (the Absolute). Having read, or listened to the teaching of an Advaita Guru, one finds that if the intuitive sense is let free to explore, then the words and sounds of the Guru infiltrate deep into one's Heart and one will definitely realize at some point, the True Nature of one's self. Yet, having deeply understood the meaning of the Guru's words and teachings, many a seeker will be left unsatisfied. There could be many reasons for this but let us explore a few.

The main obstacle to abidance in one's True Self,  is the fact that one has persistent identification with the mind-body apparatus. This is because of the constant need to have an identity in this world to function. Everyone in society has an identity, a name based on identification with this human body. Even cats and dogs are given names to identify whom you are talking about. Therefore, a name and form are an essential element of communication in this world that we live in. Then comes the realization that you are actually neither this name nor this form, thanks  to the teachings of your Guru.  You may ask "Now what?".  Or you may say, " How do I respond when someone calls me by the name with which I have associated for so long?".  As mentioned before by this author, life goes on just the same with or without self realization. There is no need for a dichotomy or a dual personality here. You are what you have always been.  Remember that the realization is essentially the removal of the false to reveal the Truth.  This is where worship and constant remembrance of the Guru is absolutely essential.  With every thought and action, if the Guru is invoked, one continues to gradually dissociate from the very idea of being this body-mind apparatus. Yes, even when you function in this society, you can do so without being attached to the actions or the rewards.

It is not for nothing that the ancient sages have repeatedly warned that the path of Self Realization is like walking on a razor's edge. It is easy to fall off the path and into this illusory world. Such is the power of Maya.  Only the constant thought of the Guru can keep one balanced on the razor's edge.

With or Without Effort?

There is a fair amount of confusion among the seekers wondering whether there should be no effort as quoted by many teachers of Advaita or as others teach, should effort be made to realize their True Nature or the Truth. The answer to that question can be aptly put as "it depends".  Why so? Let us start with who is it that wants the answer. If the one who is seeking the answer is an independent person or entity that wants the answer, then it can be stated that definitely effort is required for one to attain Realization. However, if one has already reached the conclusion that one is not an independent entity or a person but the Universal Consciousness itself, then such a question would not arise in the first place and most likely the answer would be " no effort is required since you already are what you are seeking".

As you can see it depends on your perspective and concepts. As long as you hold on to the concept of being an individual, separate from the rest of the world, in that case effort is certainly required. The effort in not in trying to gain something, but actually in trying to lose this sense of individuality that you have taken for granted and are unwilling or uninterested in losing. The Truth is one and is always unchanging, eternal and omnipresent. It is the false that is shrouding the Truth and hence it is the false that must be removed by whoever wants to discover the Truth. The false, in this case, would be the sense of individuality or ego. Hence, all effort should be focused on the inquiry into the nature of one's self (note the small "s") which is the ego, or the false sense of being an independent individual apart from the consciousness. This individual wants to discover the Truth.  The false is nothing but the strong belief in the existence of the ego.  So, ask the question, "who am I?" in which the "I" is the ego or the sense of individuality. Dive deep into this sense and find out wherefrom does it arise. Was it there in deep sleep? Investigate!

When one finds out the answer to the existence or non-existence of the ego, then the rest is simple and straightforward. Do you make any effort to be? Answer this question yourself. Did you choose to be born? Did you choose the family into which you claim to be "born" into? Did your parents choose that it should be "you" that they want? Did they have any knowledge of the exact moment of "your" conception? Even if you now consider yourself to be this body, did you make any effort to evolve from the tiny few cells in the womb to the fully formed infant that came out of the womb? Are you making any effort to beat your heart, grow your hair, grow the nails, digest the food, or create the urine by the kidneys? Investigate in this direction and see what exactly are you and what exactly do you DO.

In closing, whether or not any effort is needed in Self Realization depends on who is asking the question, and not on the answer.  Hence, the answer given to the seeker depends on the Master or Guru knowing fully well as to who is asking the question and giving the answer accordingly.

The Mysterious "I"

We are back to talking about you. Yes, "you", that you are used to saying as "I".  That same "I", the first person, which you have taken for granted and never bothered to investigate. You may say "Pray, what has that got to do with my search for God or inner peace?". The answer may surprise you since it has everything to do with your search for inner peace. In fact, it is upon discovering the True Nature of "I", that you will find what you have been looking for all this while. Some may come across this essay out of curiosity and walk away with some wonderment and bewilderment. Others may spend some time thinking about the "I" and get back to whatever else they were doing. Yet, a few of you who read this will not stop till you get the answer to the question " Who am I?". Before we go any further, there is a disclosure or disclaimer to be made by this author.  BE WARNED: The search for the mysterious "I" shall draw you in till you disappear. Now, are you ready for the journey of discovery?

We look to science or philosophy to give us answers about the world that we live in. In fact, we look to science or philosophy to give us answers about ourselves. That is because we consider ourselves to be this body. To be precise, depending on whether you live in the East or the West, what we consider to be "I' or this entity that claims to exist in this body, is somewhere in the upper half of the body. If you are from the Eastern parts of the world, you may point to the area of the heart or the solar plexus when you say "I". On the other hand, if you are from the Western parts of the world, you are convinced that this entity called "me" or "I" is somewhere in the space behind the eyes and between the ears. This "I" takes ownership of this body in a way that convinces all that not only is this "I" in the body but also owns the body just like you would own a car or a house. It is therefore common in all languages to say "My body" or "My hand" or "My heart", just like one would say "My car", or "My house" etc. This "I" also will claim responsibility for only some of the actions of the body. For instance, people may say "I am eating" or "I am breathing" or "I am growing out my hair". Yet, this "I" will not claim to some actions like the beating of the heart or the pumping of the blood by the heart. You will not hear people say "I am pumping the blood in the heart"! Instead, it is common to say "My heart is pumping the blood", just like you may say, "My car is running well" or "My air conditioner pumps out cold air". Despite these clear signals to the mystery of the entity called "I" in the spoken language,  pointing to the confused identity of "I", there is still a strong association of the "I" with the body.  The reason is that since the time we were very young children, we have been fed this concept of being the body. The mother and father, will repeatedly correct a young child speaking in the third person. When a child says "John is hungry" or "John wants to go potty", the parents will correct him by teaching him to say " I am hungry" or "I want to go potty". Over the years, teachers and society reinforce the idea that this "I" is indeed the body and is existing somewhere in the body. By the time you are reading this, you are absolutely sure (and perhaps confused!) that you are indeed the body.

Yet, the rare one will question the location of this "I" and will start the inquiry into its very existence as an entity. Assuming it is somewhere in the region of the brain or the head, when one opens up the skull, there is nowhere that one can find "me". Of course, it is unlikely you will open up your own skull to look for "I"!  Whether it is the scientist or the pathologist looking at the brain or a neurosurgeon looking at a live and functioning brain, the location of this entity called "me" or "I" remains a mystery. In fact, it is like opening up the transistor radio.   All children are enamored by the sound of a person emanating from the radio. In fact, most children imagine a person inside the radio who is speaking. Yet, when the radio is opened up or dismantled, there is no person inside. In the same way, when one searches for the entity that claims to do the body actions, one is unable to find an exact location for it.

With this type of reasoning, one should go about looking for the "I". It is only when one has a sincere desire to complete this mission, will the Guru appear out of nowhere and lead you to the Source of the I. It will become completely clear that the one who says "I" is not a separate individual encased in a body with two eyes and ears and one mouth, but indeed a Universal "I" without shape or form, a non-entity, whose existence cannot be denied and at the same time is neither in the body nor outside the body. A Non-entity that is everywhere and yet nowhere, a Non-entity that is  all and none. A Non-entity that is all objects and yet is not an object.

Yes, indeed, I am a mystery. Yet, I will reveal Myself to anyone who is sincere in the search for Me. For I am the Guru AND the disciple. I am NOT an individual and yet I am ALL individuals. In fact, I am ALL there IS.

A Case of Mistaken Identity

If you are really wondering what this teaching is all about, it can be put simply as a case of mistaken identity. What is at the crux of the quest for the Truth is not so much about the nature of Truth. It is all about your identity. Yes, your identity. This identity of yourself that you so much believe in and are convinced of its authenticity. This identity that you have a name and a form, the body. This identity that you so proudly proclaim as "me" and "mine".

You can never know the Truth as such. What you can know is the false as false. In doing so, the Truth becomes self evident. You may now ask as to what exactly is false. Everything you know is false since the basic premise that you are an entity, an entity with a name and a body is false. Only by inquiring into the nature of this entity called "me" can you really unravel this mystery.  All the reading and listening is not going to unravel the mystery.  It is only when one starts to ponder over his or her own identity does the answer come all by itself.

Your True Nature is the Absolute where there is no "I".  There should be no doubt about your True Nature as the Absolute (Parabrahman) and all else is false as you will Realize as you continue to investigate into your identity. Now, because you consider yourself to be this body and mind, it would be appropriate to start right here and slowly unravel the mystery of your identity by going backwards. The body is inanimate and it does not say "I". To make this clear, a dead body does not proclaim "I am dead". So, there must be some other factor that gives rise to the impression of "I" or the knowledge of being, or the knowledge of existence. Let us call this knowledge, consciousness. It is this consciousness, which is formless, that is responsible for the sense of being. When this consciousness mistakenly (for ease of understanding) identifies itself with the body, it gives rise to the concept of being an individual, the "I" or "me". Having now identified itself with the body and thinking that it is indeed the body, and having created this concept of being a person or individual, there is a feeling of separation and suffering or the feeling of something missing. The consciousness identified as an individual (Jeeva) feels incomplete and starts the search for the missing bit of information that will give it satisfaction or bliss (ananda).  When the individual with the help of the Guru, comes to the clear conviction that all there is, is consciousness, then there is peace or contentment. When the individual realizes that the basic premise or idea of being an individual ("I" or "me") is false, and that the Real Self is none other than the consciousness, it is called Self Realization.  In effect, the individual has disappeared in favor of the Real Self. It is only when the "I" disappears that the Real Self becomes evident.

Find out if you are individual and if so, what and where are you? Conviction comes with knowledge.  Know Thy Self.

Why Worship the Guru or God with Attributes

The seeker may come to the correct conclusion that Knowledge is the surest way to Self Realization. Of all the methods prescribed by the scriptures, the Path of Knowledge (jnana yoga) is the surest and shortest means of Self Realization.  You have all heard the message of Non-Duality and how the visible is not real. Having heard the message of Advaita from his Guru, the seeker comes to the correct conclusion that all that is visible or destructible or has attributes is unreal.  What surprises the disciple is when the Guru encourages and endorses the worship of the God with attributes (saguna Brahman). In fact, the Guru says that worship and devotion to God, with or without attributes (saguna or nirguna) is a must even for the disciple who has Realized, to stay established in the Knowledge of Non-Duality.

Nothing is more superior to Knowledge as you know by now. The disciple wants to know why after having experienced the Truth, should one continue along the path of Worship (Bhakti).  Having come to the realization that the Truth is without any attributes, why should one continue to worship that which has attributes? In fact, having attained the Ultimate Knowledge, why should one bother to pursue any spiritual practices at all, like worship of the Guru or God with attributes?  Why should one with Knowledge of That which is without attributes (which is the Reality), bow down to an idol or photograph or an idol of a God or Guru and accept that which is unreal?

In a previous essay, this author has discussed about devotion after realization (please refer to that essay).  Let it be clear, that there should be no doubt that the teachings of the Guru are the final authority. This is called faith and devotion to the Guru. Without this there is no hope for any seeker or disciple to attain Liberation.

Having said that, the seeker has a right to have his questions and doubts cleared. Now, please consider this carefully. Having acquired Knowledge and Realization, are you still doing things in life including your work, taking care of your family, their needs, your finances, your friends, and are you still participating in the activities of your family and society? Are you still eating meals, taking a bath, drinking water, cleaning the house, and taking care of your personal needs? If the answer is yes to all of the above questions, then why is it that you want to only exclude worship of the God with attributes? How come all other aspects of your life is accepted as real but not worship of the unreal God with attributes?

With your knowledge of discrimination, you know that all that is perceived is false, and yet you do not give up any of your activities.  You listen to and obey the orders of your boss at work, which is the same as bowing down to the boss. So, why is it that you want to give up the worship of God with attributes? What is wrong with bowing down to the photograph of a God in human form or a Guru in human form or for that matter any form including one with multiple arms and legs, or with an elephant head? Please answer this question with sincerity. Has the mortal Guru who is one with attributes,  not given you access to the Ultimate in Knowledge?  Why then would you not want to bow down to this mortal Guru? What kind of knowledge is this?

One who has pride in attaining the Knowledge and feels " I am great" does not have the True Knowledge. He is one who is still identified with the body.  Mind you, if there is no worship, there is no Knowledge (jnana). It is an indication of one who is still suffering from body-mind-identification. It is an identification of one who thinks "I am the doer".

So, never give up the worship of the Guru or the God with attributes. Start every action by remembering your God or Guru. Remember that God is the doer of all actions. By leaving all actions to a God with attributes, one slowly but surely becomes identified with That which is attribute-less and eventually realizes his True Nature, which is without any attributes whatsoever. May God bless you.